Home Alone

oooooooooooooooooooooooosadsadsad. Today, Mr Man and Mr Woman went out - and they stayed out all day! And then Mr Desh went out as well! I was left all on my own! ooooooooooooooononononononnonono no nono nono no no no ooo o o z oo z ooo zz ooo zzzzzzzzzzzzz oo zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

but then they came back! Mr Desh was still out though. He's a stealth cat. I couldn't find him anywhere. But he does love me, I know he does because while everyone was sleeping this afternoon, he brought a present from outside - a birdie! He knows I want to make a pair of angel kitty wings -

and he brought me a birdie! Mr Desh is great. He's really clever. So I tried to make birdie feathers into wings. It was really hard, though. I don't think it worked very well.


Mr Desh, can I have another one, please?

My nemesis

Everywhere I go, I hear it. The endless, gruesome, high-pitched cheeping. Not a moment's peace. I ask you, what have I done to deserve it. Admittedly I ate his mate. And chicks. But what am I meant to do? I'm a formula one cat. I have fuel needs. It isn't easy being a plush stealth cat, you know. Least they didn't go to waste.

I suppose his gran was a bit lacking on the eating front but I did my best. His cousins had almost nothing on them. The in-laws were good though, I enjoyed them. You would think I would get a little gratitude, but no. Just the incessant cheeping. I had my eye on a good plump pigeon yesterday, got myself nicely into position and who should show up and make a racket?

Yes, you guessed it. Captain Jack. The sparrow that never shuts up. At this rate I'll have to resort to eating the oh-so-ironically named Wellbeloved nubbles that the humans seem to think passes for food fit for a stealth cat.

Hello world!

Hello! This is me, looking out at the brand new world out there. Actually, that was yesterday because today I got a bit nosy and went for a wander. I WAS told not to go anywhere until my wings worked - whatever wings are - but hey, rules, schmools, I say. Didn't realise the ground would be so hard, though. So, just kinda sitting here, really, waiting for the world to start. Noisy, isn't it? Really noisy.

Hey, what's that jangling sound? Kinda like bells -

Bit worried

Actually, am worried about the male. Mr Man, as Cat of Little Brain calls him. He's spending a suspiciously large amount of time surfing the cat blogosphere and - as if more proof were needed - just look at the 'cute kitten' picture he posted last entry. I ask you. His mind is definitely going. Ash has polluted his brain.

Right. I'm off outside for a bit. Left the remains of a flying crunchy somewhere a few days ago and I'm hungry.


They fed me over an hour ago! What's a starving cat to do? Especially as the crunchies fly away when they hear me coming these days. Damn it, these bells are annoying.

A new toy!

oooooooooooo Mr Desh! You've got a new toy! It flies really well, Mr Desh! It's got feathers and everything, and it chirps, too! ooooooooooooo! ooooooooooooooo!

Oh, Mr Desh, you've broken it. It's not flying anymore. Mr Desh? Mr Desh? What are you doing, Mr Desh? Oh, Mr Desh!

Ugh, Mr Desh!

Chirpy chirpy cheep cheep

Confounded the humans last night. Heard the male saying we were odd, as we never slept on the bed. "There's a thought", I thought and, as the lights went out, I leapt on the bed and settled down for a bit of a snooze. I like it really when they coo over me. I just won't admit it out loud, is all. You won't catch me making a song and dance out of wanting a bit of a purr, unlike some small grey cats I could mention.

Woke up feeling hungry. Damn it, they only gave me four meals yesterday. Don't they realise I have a metabolism like a jet engine? Went downstairs in the dark and, as I thought, food bowls empty.

Next meal - 6am. Curses! That's an hour away. What to do? Think I'll go and sit on the roof and watch the sky.

Hey, what's that chirping sound?